Mark reviews ASM #632!!!!



STORY: Zeb Wells

ART: Chris Bachalo/Emma Rios

REVIEW: Master Filmmaker Mark Mackner
I know, I know. Go ahead and make your jokes and catty comments. Yes, the column is called the WEEKLY Web-up, and I haven’t posted in about 2 weeks. So yeah, I admit it. This review is WAAAAAY late. But, in addition to being a comic reviewer, I’m also a Master Filmmaker, Dad, and many other things that sometimes keep me from my duties here at the Web-Up, and I apologize for that. Plus, you know, POPTARDS doesn’t pay me, so that doesn’t help in motivating me, either 😉 And, man, I’ve got this AMAZING screenplay I’m working on. It’s gonna be PHENOMENAL!!!!!!

OK, enough preliminaries. On to the review! So this is the 3rd chapter of the 4-part LIZARD tale SHED, which marks the end of the GAUNTLET, and a sort of rebirth for the Lizard as a major villain in Spidey’s new status quo. Since it’s been so long in between WEB-Ups, here’s a brief recap of SHED… Curt Connors is working for Phelcorps, a pharmaceutical giant. He’s experimenting with lizards again. His boss is a douche. One night, his boss antagonizes him, reawakening The Lizard. Lizard kills boss (and other lab employees), and goes out to search for Billy, Connors’ son.

HUGE SPOILER ALERT!!!!! And this IS huge. Like, Electro knocking down the Daily Bugle building huge. You probably already know by now, seeing as how this issue came out a couple of weeks ago, but BILLY CONNORS, son of Curt, The Lizard, is dead! After several efforts to kill the kid over the decades, the Lizard has finally succeeded in slaying son Billy. As a Spider-Fan, that’s really fucking significant. And he’s NOT a super-powered type, so it’s pretty certain that he really IS dead, with no hope of resurrection. He’s been a recurring Spidey character for as long as The Lizard, so it almost feels like a death in the family for me. It still hasn’t quite sunk in yet. Billy Connors is dead?! Poor kid.

As The Lizard closes in, defenseless Billy says, “You’re going to kill me, aren’t you? I knew it. I’ve always known it.” And those are his last words. That’s fucking SAD, man. ANA KRAVEN leaves Billy there and basically feeds him to the monster, then watches from a safe distance. So, yeah. One of the most fucked up things to happen in a Spidey comic in a while.

Spidey arrives on the scene too late to save Billy. The art on the title page here is striking… Spidey, cradling the dead Billy Connors in his arms, surrounded by trash, the word SHED spelled out in the shadows.

An enraged Spidey goes after Lizard, only to find molted lizard skin. After killing Billy, Lizard shed all of his skin, and comes back with new scales, and without the mental presence of Curt Connors. The Lizard is in complete control now. Curt Connors has given up trying to fight it. He failed to save his boy, and now, with nothing left to live for, he surrenders his body to the Lizard. The Lizard always knew that if Billy was eliminated, that would destroy any last connection he had with humanity, and he could go all-out reptile. And that’s exactly what’s happened here. As Lizard puts it, “Kahn rrs… is SHED”. Lizard has shed what he always considered dead weight, the human identity of Curt Connors.

This is some hardcore shit, man. We’re looking at perhaps NEVER seeing Curt Connors again! BUT, I have a feeling that Lizard isn’t gonna be very happy when he catches wind that the Kravens were using him, and that he’s probably gonna come knocking on the Kraven’s door very soon.

OH, and Lizard’s got a new power! You remember how he used to be able to communicate with other reptiles via telepathy? Well, now that Connors has discovered a part of our brain that’s similar to a reptiles, Lizard can now isolate that part of the brain and control humans. Or, “I talk to lizard inside you”, as he puts it. He battles Spidey, and very nearly wins, when Spidey escapes, and meets up with CARLIE COOPER.

From there, we shift from CHRIS BACHALO’s pencils to EMMA RIOS’. The transistion is a little jarring, as their styles are radically different. And it’s only for a few pages at the end, so I don’t know why they didn’t just have Bachalo finish it. However, I DO like Rios’ work! She’s great.

The story ends with Lizard walking through the City, controlling all humans he comes across, making them behave like reptiles. In other words, it’s all about eating, mating, and territory. Needless to say, carnage ensues on a massive scale.

So let’s wrap this one up, finally…

STORY: A+ Zeb Wells, you killed Billy Connors, and that makes me more sad than I would’ve expected. Still, it adds an emotional weight to the story, and you made Lizard (One of my fave villains) more powerful than ever, so kudos!

ART: A+ Lots to admire here, like that title page I mentioned earlier, and a full page pic of Lizard getting in Spidey’s face. Good stuff.

This week will see the conclusion of SHED. I’ll have a review in a reasonable amount of time.

And THAT is the WORD! So sayeth THE MASTER!!!!!!!

Add me on Facebook!!!!

Posted in : Misc
Tags: , , , , , ,

Mark reviews ASM #632!!!!”

Add Comments (+)

  1. Good job MasterFilmmaker MarkMackner. I feel sad for Doc Connors. The Lizard has always been one of my favorite villains from the cartoon. Unfortunately I don’t read these comics, but I enjoy reading them through the crazy mind of MasterFilmmaker MarkMackner. PopTards doesn’t pay shit, I hear it’s upper management that has been holding all the cash.

  2. I trulyliked your site on lizards I found it very fascinating and will be coming back soon

Leave a Reply